Joe's Christmas list

Although the pommel is a little disturbing, this is a wonderful concept! The Rocking Horse Toilet features foot rests to elevate your legs. As everyone knows (including me, as of 5 minutes ago), it's much healthier to poop from a squatting position. Why, hemorrhoids are almost unknown in countries that feature filthy holes in the ground to poop in! I'm not sure if that's because these countries don't know what hemorrhoids are, or because you die much sooner than you'd develop them.

Hmm... Maybe the pommel is for those really tough Number 2s...